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Can We Afford to Get Old?
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As they age, many women decide to take steps to rejuvenate themselves. Some change their hair, update their wardrobe, start working out, and some even get cosmetic surgery.I'm all for such “rejuvenation.” If you don't like the way you look or the way the years are changing you, do what you can to make yourself feel better. That said, there are women who make these changes for more than just superficial reasons...they do it for job security.
The recent NY Times best seller How Not to Look Old says, “Looking hip is not just about vanity anymore, it's critical to every woman's personal and financial survival.” The book goes on to say that “we cannot afford to let ourselves go!”
So, is it true that we are being discriminated against as we get older? Is our society encouraging ageism? Well, with books like How Not to Look Old increasing in popularity and cosmetic procedures becoming so common, it would sure seem so. I know I'm not the only one who thinks there's something wrong with that...what are your thoughts?
Eunice, DTR, CPT-ACE
Nutrition Specialist
"There are no shortcuts to any place worth going"
Labels: Aging
I think we forget that with age comes wisdom. We cannot all be 20 and believe me, I would not want to do it all over again. I enjoy my age, 50, and the life skills that I have learned over my lifetime. I feel that everyday we learn new things and that with wisdom that has been garnered over the years we have a lot to give to the 20 year olds in the world.
I agree with the first comment. And that said, I do not believe there is anything wrong with wanting to look your best. How each person determines what that is is individual. Re: wanting to look youthful for work. Whether we agree or not how one is received is often influenced by appearance; so, looking good helps alleviate some work stress. Seems like there can be a happy balance in there somewhere. I certainly don't want to look 22 when I am 60. Nor do I want my opinions discounted merely because I am "too old".
I am 68 and have enjoyed a busy and interesting life. I watch my weight, work out, try to eat a balanced diet and still work full time. The fact that I have a few wrinkles doesn't really have any bearing on what I have achieved or can still accomplish.
I am about to hit the big 4-0!! I am one that feels that age is only a number and you are only as old as you feel! Staying in shape, working out, eating healthy, etc. is not only good for the eyes, but also for your heart and soul! If you still feel young, why not have the looks to go with it...with all of that AND the wisdom you have acquired...WOW...what a package!!! :) I am all for growing older GRACEFULLY (and looking totally hot)!!!!
As a recently retired female manager, I have found that ageism is common. I am not treated the same as I was when I was working and am too often referred to as Ma'am, dear and other similar terms.
People I meet do not listen to me as they used to, and there is a general lack of respect for women over 60 which is confirmed by my friends in the same age bracket.
When I read the original article, I was not surprised at the results of a study by the Boston Centre for Retirement Research:
"younger women were 40% more likely to receive an offer of a job interview than women over 50; a woman over 50 in Boston would have to send in 27 résumés to get one job interview where a younger woman would have to send in only 19."
Ageism IS prevalent, and we must stand up and be counted as not accepting delivery!
I think it has a lot to do with loving yourself. If you love yourself unconditionally, then you radiate that energetically. Learning to appreciate all your attributes equally is the only way to live a full and prosperous life.
Go ahead if you think you need botox injections, a face-lift, liposuction...I feel like getting a hair transplant because i like having hair and suffering from male pattern balding....go for it, as long as most experts agree that there is no the risk to your health and it is really within your budget..
..I wish aging didn't exist and that everyone was attractive and young looking....wisdom and material wealth is small consolation when our body, the “temple” of the soul and mind, slowly degenerates over time and eventually expires..aging goes against the grain of how we feel inside (ie, “young at heart”, “ÿouthful nature”, etc)....if there's a pill or some sort of surgery for physical immortality please write another article and tell the world about it...trying to maintain this youthfulness through diet, exercise, wellness is unfortunately a bit of an eternal struggle and ultimately a losing battle.
...that's not to say that healthy diet and exercise are not important...more importantly diet and exercise makes you feel youthful, improves your health...improving your appearance through diet and exercise is a “bonus” of healthy living.... but if your like most employees, you'll think that your efforts deserve an even bigger bonus ...on the positive side, the longer one keeps with a job and the harder an employee works at his job, the bonus eventually improves....
And about discrimination against women in the workplace because of their lack of a attractiveness or a youthful look, I believe there's more than one side to that story...
I'm a mid-level manager working in international business and can assure you that the majority of conventional white and blue collar jobs do not require good looks ...the great majority of women in the company are not lookers but still have jobs. If one needed look youthful and good looking to keep their job, then about less than 5% of people would continue to have a job...one should open their eyes, most people do not look good whether they are old or young...and take away the make up as well...most people are not good looking but know how to make themselves attractive through props, like make-up and clothing....
...of course, if leadership, sales, arts and entertainment, journalism, fashion modeling, leisure, erotic services, etc is your line of work...then beauty, attractiveness, charisma are very important ...it is correct that you should expect your looks to be a factor in keeping your job...that's the name of those games...if you you find this fact too hard to deal with, then you should change career paths...of course, there is a subset of jobs in these industries that require ugly people, but this is less true for women than it is for men....sorry, but woman thy name is frail beauty...
As a business manager, one of the reasons why I don't like working with women is because a woman's looks could compromise my impartiality, fairness and soundness of judgment in carrying out my responsibilities. The last thing I need on the job is to have my hormones charged up by a young (or older) bimbo-blond secretary...I also do not want to have my staff unduly distracted by a model in the workplace...I have a job to do and need to concentrate on it...i prefer appreciating a woman's beauty in my leisure time...
Without a doubt, I prefer working with women that are competent and not so good looking... I can appreciate a woman's talent and passion for her work no matter what she looks like.
You suggest that women do not feel secure in their jobs because of the way they look, but I feel that there are a lot of women out there that use their looks to entrench or advance their careers. There are so many men in positions of power whose social life with women is essentially unsatisfying (e.g., a poor married life with little romance and sex, single and lonely, odd personality, ugliness, physically deformed, etc.) that they fall prey to their lust and vanity and give favorable treatment to attractive women who are not really competent and diligent at what they do. Most working men and women (the fair-minded ones) can easily recognize this type of woman and generally hold them in contempt, secretly or otherwise...but there are other men and women in the workplace who believe that if your a woman who wants to go places, beauty and youthfulness is a prerequisite...use everything they got, including their looks, to advance their careers...
i could go on but this comment post is already too long...this is such a complex and interesting subject, i suggest that you revisit your thoughts on “rejuvenating”...your probably not just talking about looking young, your also probably talking about good looks, beauty, sexiness, seductiveness, desirability, self-image...watch Nip/Tuck...this is a great artistic work on the many issues surrounding physical beauty and the suffering people go through in chasing it down...
I enjoyed a recent show Oprah had on growing old. For all the women who did not look their age, it was because of a love of life, exercise, eating right, and some sort of meditation or yoga. After 25 years of marriage he said, "Because you are too fat and undesirable." I started working on those very areas, it has been 5 years and I am happy with myself and not because anyone says.
I think any advantage women get in their careers by making themselves look younger through surgical enhancements would be diminished by all the downtime from the surgeries involved, not to mention the vast sums of money it takes to go that route. You are probably much better off to just accept the fact that we all get older and hope for the best. Besides, a lot of women who spend all that time improving up being extremely self-absorbed and BORING. Why not work on improving your mind and developing hobbies and outside interests rather than dwelling on trying to be something you're not? Also, it fools NO ONE. You just look like an old person who decided to spend a small fortune to try to look young, which, in the end makes you look foolish.
You know what, whether we like it or not we will all grow old (except one dies young), so why do we run away from it. The best way to approach this is to get prepared for it, eat healthy, exercise and keep good habits so that we age gracefully. There is nothing more attractive than a well aged person full of life and vitality.
I think it is imporatant to look your age and take pride in it. Having said that it is equally important to attempt to look as good as you can and be as fit and healthy as you can. Also at an older age you look different not necessarily bad or ugly.
i dont like getting old. i turned 52 yesterday!
sure i wouldnt mind being 30 again!i wish we all didn;t have to get old!
but i am trying to enjoy those years also. i am trying to eat healthier and work out and walk alot. it very important i think.
its strange sometimes looking in the mirror and seeing gray roots and wrinkles. kinda scary sometimes but i don't think about it a lot.for now that's life!
although eveyone still thinks im in my forties! it makes me feel good to hear that. i never tell my age because people think im younger. so i just let them assume i am. not that im ashamed of my age. but i do agree older people are treated differentwhen it comes to job interviews. i dont think there is anything wrong with trying to make ourselves look the best we can. it helps to make us feel that we are the best we can be.
I think it is sad that woman will go to any length to stay young looking. It does not change the truth of the matter that we all age at the same rate. As a 40 year old I find it pathetic that a woman will have surgery,dye thier hair and plaster on makeup to "lie" about thier age. Why can't we be thankful we have been blessed to live and show it ?
I am 56 today. I would go back and start reliving my life from 27 on BUT only if I would be allowed to use what I've learned in the 29 years since.
I have no problem with looking your best for work or for that significant other, but has anyone considered what is actually going into your body, and picture 10 years from now, when the skin loses its elasticity and starts to sag, what will you do when there is nothing you can do to firm it up.
I believe that we live in a stressful society to look young at any cost. Unfortunately sometimes all this surgeries lead to deaths.I just lost a friend 46, who had plastic surgery from her late 20s on. She had 3 breast implant surgeries, at the end one was leaking. She shot Botox all over her face, neck chest. She worked out 3 to 4 hrs a day and I believe finally her body said no more!! Leukemia came and even after a bone marrow transplant she died. I am sure that the doctors that perform the surgeries are rich and happy.
We are always trying a quick fix, instead of finding ways to be happy and healthy so we can age HEALTHYLY and see how beautiful we are. Plastic surgeons,drug companies and society are actually pushing women to a very unhealthy lifestyles.
My friend was never satisfied with her looks.......very sad. Let see what the results of Botox studies will be in 10 yrs......by then the manufacturer will already made millions.
I am an attractive, healthy 46 yrs old human being. I take good care of myself for myself and my loved ones, if someone wants to treat me differently because of my age it is their problem not mine.
Trust me 46 is very young to die, think all you have ahead....enjoy life and the natural beauty of humanity.
i'm now 43 and i believe that growing old is part oflife's cycle and we should not stop it nor can we stop ourselves looking old. Beautifying onself is not a sin and i love fixing up myself in a more natural way , anything non surgical is safer and can prolong our lives no side effects either. I dream of growing old GRACEFULLY with a loving and young heart. IF we know how to carry our problems well this is a big plus is keeping off the wrinkles coz no amount of surgery or cosmetic can stop us from growing old except being happy and accepting onself for what you are.
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